dopamine

So recently I came back to India and probably in the worst of times. I landed here right in the middle of the second wave of the COVID pandemic. And although it is a grave concern, for maintaining the theme of this site, I will talk about another disturbing issue. With lockdowns being announced in metropolitan cities, mental health especially for extroverts is getting hugely affected. More so, for singles, the dating life and associated dopamine have seen a big drop. Thankfully, that changed when I met the muse of the post. The first look in itself captured it all, she is like cuteness personified. From the childlike bespectacled eyes to her Harry Potter T-shirt and quaintly done dim-lit room. Even she recently returned to the country after around a decade in Singapore. and is staying at her parents’ house in Delhi. So our only feasible way to meet is to sneak into her place post everyone has slept. I dropped by her place and as luck would have it, her brother was awake and around the entrance area. I guess for the first time in my dating life of over a decade, I waited outside a girl’s house. As he was making dinner, so she came out after a few minutes and we went for a midnight stroll in her neighborhood. It was definitely ‘a walk to remember.’ We went to her place after twenty minutes and hit it off from the outset. She is an introvert and a patient listener, so I went on with my tales and insights. At the end of one such monologue, she told me “I got it five minutes back, but seeing your enthusiasm, didn’t want to interrupt you.” I just wish I could have been so thoughtful about others’ happiness. Time with her just flew by, from talking about hilarious dating encounters to crazy qualms of mothers of the Indian matrimonial pool to her angst against the US, we didn’t even realize when it was 4 in the night already. Coming to the MBA concept of the ‘Landing Page’. It is the final goto point where the advertiser wants the consumer to reach to close the deal. For example, an e-commerce website would consider an advertisement successful if the consumer purchases the product advertised. In this case, the point of sale of the good on the e-commerce website is the landing page. An analogy can be drawn in the modern dating context of the digital era. It’s the successful culmination point of all the dating shenanigans (texting, Instagram likes, coffee, etc.). It can be your place, date’s place, or any place with privacy where the two of you can be yourselves. I am not a big fan of the wine and dine ritual. The risk of COVID, people, pollution, noise, the pressure to make a good formal impression overpaid drinks (experience economy), commute time, waiting time, are a few reasons against it. On average, the bars/ cafes/ restaurants charge three to four times the MRP of even packed items. All this is justified in the name of the experience economy. What logic does it make to pay exorbitantly if the experience is having each other’s company? Why are we paying an outsider for that? And if the company sucks, it will suck irrespective of the place. Also, then later on when the sunk cost (time invested) becomes too high, people often realize that those formal impressions were farthest from reality. All my life, I didn’t have a problem with a landing page. In my teenage and IIT days, I used to drive. I used to stay by myself in Gurgaon, IIM days and Mumbai, Bangalore, and everywhere outside the country. In fact, at IIM Ahmedabad I used to stay in a coed hostel and all the other rooms on my floor were occupied by girls. Due to the pandemic and subsequent lockdowns, I am presently crashing at my parents’ place. That brings me to the bewitching Harry Potter fan. So is this it? Have I finally found the Sorcerer’s Stone? Is she the patient listener that was missing all my life? Well, she is working on Singapore timings so has to get up quite early. Her next workday was spoiled because of the late night till 4 and her work and mental health have a higher priority for her. Also, she had her skepticism about me being a philanderer and getting bored with people quickly. Anyway, the night was a much-needed respite for me with fun, laughter, her warm presence when cuddled in my arms, and her legs wrapped around mine. Later, Sidhant